Despite his best friend's mangling at the hands of Randy Orton in front of a massive audience, Paul London seemed rather composed and reserved. He sat in a comfy chair located in a corner of his hotel room and thoughtfully looked over the crossword puzzle he had resting upon his lap. Folding one leg over the other, and showcasing his spiffy pair of black loafers, he tapped his pen lightly against his chin while wracking his mind for the correct word to progress through his brain teaser. His other member of the Midnight Gang, and perhaps the only one left, Tiffany, was not in such high spirits. She wasn't as garishly dressed as was typical for her. She only wore a long gray t-shirt to conceal that the fact that she apparently had no pants on. Her make up was low-key as well, sporting just a small, black thunderbolt design underneath her right eye. After staring mindlessly at a laptop resting on a stool in front of her, she gripped the sides of her long, messy hair and groaned in frustration. Soon, she glanced back at London from her sitting position.
| Tiffany | Paul! What are we going to do? Brian is gone! I mean..he..is..gone. You should have seem him when they took him away on that stretcher. I don't think he's ever coming back. What are we going to do?
She repeated her initial question with a greater sense of urgency.
| Tiffany | Are we going after Orton? Are we going to jump that Ikeda SKANK? ..Paul? PAUL! Are you listening?
London lifted his head and scratched a few fingers through his dark colored hair.
| Paul London | Hm?
| Tiffany | You weren't listening.
The blond spoke through gritted teeth, irritated.
| Paul London | A thousand pardons, dear. You seem stressed. Care to indulge?
He pushed himself out of his chair and sprung to his feet. The crossword puzzle dropped to the floor and it revealed that he had written "bone" and "meat" for every possible answer.
| Paul London | Cut it sharp, break it down, couple pounds, roll it up, add heat, kiss the end, let the colored vapors in.
Paul's jingle about smoking pot didn't do a great deal to change Tiffany's disposition.
| Tiffany | NO. Paul. I don't want to roll a joint right now. Why are you so calm about this?
| Paul London | Why not?
| Tiffany | Because there's only two of us left! I mean, we used to have Daff and Jams and Reksy and Stevie and BRIAN and..
| Paul London | We are merely going to carry on our honored tradition. We will carry on for The Midnight Gang. And we will begin by staking claim to the IC Title.
London placed his hands on his hips and gazed approvingly out of the open window, observing the warm, sunny day. He thought that a nice, shiny belt would make a nice accessory. A very nice accessory.
| Tiffany | But you have to get through that Kennedy guy first. He's sort of on a roll. I mean, he won that thing by beating AJ Styles and he's the World Champion.
| Paul London | Yes. Yes he is. I have no doubt in my mind that he will be a very challenging opponent. Taking a title with such prestige from his grasp is going to be difficult. His confidence is at an all time high and he must feel as though he can conquer any obstacle.
London climbed onto the couch and struck a heroic like pose. The only thing missing was a cape to dynamically whip about behind him.
| Paul London | But I have a plan.
| Tiffany | ..You..do?
| Paul London | I do. Would you like to hear it?
| Tiffany | ..Yeah, man. I want to hear it.
Paul jumped down from the couch and crept over to Tiffany. He leaned in closely and whispered softly to her.
| Paul London | ..Really?
| Tiffany | YES! Just spit it out already! Damn!
| Paul London | Brilliant! Well, you see, Tiff, I had this image come to me last night in my dreams. A shaman like vision. I had this vision of shaving all of the skin and muscle from Ken's face until it resembled a skull with blond hair. Which is connected to a full, cold corpse, it's eyes wide open the actual eyeballs hanging out of their sockets by the stocks. I ground up his stomach until it resembled eggplant and goat cheese lasagna. A few of his intestines smeared across a wall. And then, I saw myself detaching his spinal cord, not cleaning it, and then Fed Exing the entire thing to his mother.
He clapped his hands and spread his arms out, wiggling his fingers around with a "TA-DA!" type of grin as if he were expecting applause. The grin on his face was a jovial one, not exactly one you would expect someone to have after speaking about such a gory topic. Tiffany only stared back with wide eyes and her mouth slightly agape. Paul placed his hands onto her shoulders. He said his next word in a dark, intense tone.
| Paul London | I'm..
A very long, uncomfortable pause.
| Paul London | ..joking! Ha ha! Just kidding! I had a dream where I pinned him and held the title high above my head! That's all! Just ribbing you! Ha ha ha! You know how much of a kidder I am!
Laughing filled the room but Tiffany's laughter was decidedly more nervous.
| Paul London | You know what? We should bond tonight. You and I. I'm going to a very snazzy establishment tonight. Come with? A pre-celebration before my victory over Ken!
| Tiffany | ..I've..got..plans..
| Paul London | ..Really? Reservations are hard to come by. Are you sure? No matter! I will take the evening alone, I suppose! And when you see me next I may very be able to call myself a champion once more! I'm going to shower and prepare. I'll bring you some left overs.
Tiffany blinked hard and gulped. She had begin to think that these left overs could very well end up being human body parts.
| Tiffany | Thanks. ..Kick..his..ass?
| Paul London | Will do!
Paul strutted off into the bathroom while listening to the tune of Wiz Khalifa's "Young, Wild and Free". before closing the door behind him. Tiffany looked about, quickly slipped on a pair of shorts and sneakers and made an exit from the room.
------
A deep sigh of jubilation.
| Paul London | Today is a new day.
With a dark sky hanging over head, filled with bright stars, Paul London looked to standing in a location straight out a Disney fairytale. A large, majestic fountain was positioned behind him and a well kept courtyard was the surroundings. He stood outside of a large, fancy restaurant, brimming with activity inside. Well dressed eccentrics could be seen flocking inside, jazz music playing inside. London himself was dressed in his typical whimsical fashion. A black top hat with red diamond designs on it was his most notable fashion choice. The rest of his motif followed this design, red and black. It was a very, steam punk type of looking. Snapping a black glove against his wrist, he smiled to the camera.
| Paul London | And despite the fact that my good friend Brian Kendrick was so ruthlessly assaulted at Wrestle Mania..
Paul removed his top hat and placed it over his heart, bowing his head in a solemn show of remembrance.
| Paul London | ..I must carry on. And I will begin with my conquest of Mr. Kennedy at Warfare. It is in my belief that in order to carry on, to progress, one must sometimes shed one's skin so to speak. To show who you really are. I one point in my career I took a rather nasty boot to the skull from Randy Orton..
London rose a foot and imitated a soccer kick.
| Paul London | ..and it scrambled my brain to say the least. I believed I was from the future! Oh, what fun I had! Such a jovial time. I would speak of outer space and aliens and all manner of bizarre things. Everyone just seemed to love it. But eventually my condition improved. But I continued on with the facade. I thought that's people were accustomed to from me. If they wanted a space man, I would give them a space man. And when I returned to this company I had all KINDS of wacky ideas!
Paul pursed his lips and shook his head, wagging a finger back and forth.
| Paul London | But Brian pulled me aside, smacked the taste from my mouth and gave me some sound advice. He told me to stop trying to please everyone. Stop trying to be what I wasn't. This was from someone who portrayed a comedy stoner, a talk show and spiritual guru. He finally decided to stop to catering to anyone other than himself. And that's exactly what I have done. Who you see before you is the real Paul London.
A bow was taken.
| Paul London | Which leads me to my next question. When are we going to see the true Ken Kennedy? After all this time he is still repeating his last name from a ceiling hung microphone? He is still referring to his fans as "Assholes"? He's still hanging out with Goldust? I see no evolution. I see how true progress. Despite his most recent accomplishments I still see the same loser who could never rise above his mediocre position.
London held out his palms innocently in front of his chest.
| Paul London | Don't jump to conclusions. I am not doubting Ken's ability as a performer. Nor am I downplaying the fact that he finally was able to..hm..get over the hump. He became a champion. After trying so hard for years. After always being the runner up. After always just coming up just a tad short. His title defense at Wrestle Mania was nothing more than awe inspiring. Good show, Ken. Truly a magnificent performance.
Paul supplied the applause for his opponent and before a look of regret swept across his face.
| Paul London | But I'm afraid..that's it's all for naught. And I truly do feel awful about it all. Truly. Ken's fragile confidence, that he masks with bravado and a loud voice, is going to crumble. Because I am going to become the new IC Champion. And I will wear that belt proudly and carry on it's proud tradition. In order to do so I'm going to have to hurt Ken. I'm going to have to hurt him badly. I know he doesn't want to give up his first title. He's going to give it his all. However, it just isn't going to be enough. Though he no longer carry's the weight of being a supposed "choke artist" the fact still remains. He is and always will be a loser. An outdated..simple minded..loser. Perhaps when he discovers his true self we'll finally see that Mr. Kennedy that can rise to the heights of a World Champion.
It looked as though insulting Ken was doing some harm to Paul himself.
| Paul London | The likely hood of that ever occurring? Very slim. I don't think a slap in the face and a pep talk would do it. I'm just going to have to go out to that ring and exterminate poor Ken with extreme prejudice. He finally had his moment, we're all happy for him, but it's time for him to step side. But let's not dwell on the negative's! I'M going to be the new champion! It's going to be a wonderful time for our audience and the wrestling world all together. And I really everyone will be excited for what I plan on doing once I've got the gold. Because I know I am. And I would LOVE for Ken to announce my victory if he isn't a poor sport. He has a strong speaking voice. ..Well..I would like for him to announce it when he's physically able, of course.
A couple walk passed, a blond woman in a dress with bizarre feather covered shoulder pads lightly graced her fingers along Paul's shoulders.
| Woman | I love your look, dear. Smashing.
| Paul London | Why thank you, madam.
Paul's lips slowly curled into a snarl and his eyes narrowed upon the woman as she disappeared into the restaurant.
| Paul London | Wish I could say the same for you, stupid, tacky bitch. I will peel your skin off and use it as a coffee table.
That unhinged look remained in London's eyes before he spun back to the camera. His voice turned back to it's cheerful type of pitch.
| Paul London | Heeyyy! Looks I need to head inside! No night is complete if I don't tickle a few ivories and wow an audience with my rendition of Sinatra! Next time I'm here I'll be able to show off my brand, spanking new IC Title! Good night to you all!
Like an over-exaggerated cartoon character, London clicked his heels together and took off inside.
